The term “insecurity” isn’t a term that’s unfamiliar to the Black woman. Due to the many negative stereotypes and accusations surrounding Black women, insecurities are something that we battle daily. What makes it worse is that insecurities has no age; it can affect any woman! So whether you’re a young woman in your early 20’s or a more seasoned woman, you can still struggle with battling the many issues of self-love and acceptance that plague us as Black women have. The most common insecurities that we face lies in our physical and mental, including:
- Our skin color -We’re either too light or too dark. Discoloration is considered ugly & if you bleach or correct your skin you’ll be looked at as fake or not accepting who you are.
- Our hair – We’re either made fun of for having “nappy” natural hair, for wearing a relaxer, or for wearing hair weave. If we wear too many colors we’re “ghetto trash”.
- Our body shapes – Everyone has to be an hourglass or BBW to be pretty, right? (sarcasm) Stretch marks are ugly, so is a little tummy.
- Our personality/image – If we speak up, we’re too opinionated. If someone does us wrong and we’re arguing we’re “loud, ratchet, and ghetto”. If we stand tall with confidence we’re “bougie and fake” or “trying to be white”. If we’re comfortable with our sexuality we’re a slut.
- Our intelligence – If a black woman is “too smart” they’re not dateable or likeable. They think they know everything. They have smart mouths. They’re not womanly for wanting to show intelligence and/or pursue a career.
This is just a few, there are are many more insecurities that we have to deal with but these are the most universal. WELL, IT’S 2017 AND THESE INSECURITIES ARE GOING TO BE DEALT WITH! Yes, it’s time. It’s time to get back to loving ourselves; let’s go back to love this year! Self love leads to confidence and will destroy those insecurities, but we know that loving yourself can sometimes take practice. So ladies, we’re going to share 5 ways you can practice more self love this year to kill insecurity:
- Repeating daily affirmations – “I love my chocolate skin” or “I love my thin legs” are sayings we need to tell ourselves. Say something you love about yourself every morning daily, and repeat it throughout the day if need be.
- Write it down so you know it’s real – Remember having to write, “I will not chew gum in class” repeatedly on the chalkboard? The more you write it, the more you’ll believe it. Write whatever you need to remind yourself that you are all that and a bag of hot chips.
- Plan “Me Time” – Take some time to relax, read, exercise, or a nice bubble bath. Meditate, do yoga, or pray to whomever you pray to and thank them for making you the way you are.
- Dress up – Put on your red lipstick, red bottoms and do your hair the way you like it! When you look good, you feel good.
- Let go of caring what other people think – Give yourself a day off of social media if you need it to help you stop the comparisons, and stay away from negative opinions. What other people think of you is none of your business, as long as you’re being the best you that you can be, that’s all that matters.
Queens, let’s make 2017 the year of love and acceptance. Be good to yourself starting today!
Written By: Kahina Ray
Follow Kahina On Instagram: @_k.ray