One of the dopest highlights of being married is the, ‘til death do us part, part. Nobody gets married with the intention of not growing together as a couple. By the time you get married, hopefully you form a bond with someone who just so happens to be the homie-lover-friend that you want to spend the rest of your life with. But even in the best marriages, as time goes on, life happens. Obstacles will turn up that you never thought you would be in the middle of, and you find yourself wondering why you feel so alone when you’re with your husband every day. So, how do you fix feeling lonely in a marriage?
Find the source. Are you really being abandoned, or is that your perception? Maybe the isolation is being caused by you. Have you stopped communicating? Walled yourself off inside the home? Figure out what has changed – and it may have been very gradual – that makes you now feel like you are in the marriage alone.
Don’t place blame. Avoid blaming yourself or your hubs. When you blame him for working too much or not paying you any attention, guess what? He’s going to do more of that. Don’t give him another reason to put up a wall.
Be open and honest. Your feelings are important to him, too. Tell him how you feel. Just because you are sitting in the same room together doesn’t mean you are spending time together. If you are glued to Instagram and he’s lost in the TV, no one is talking nor is your bond being strengthened. Detach from technology to talk to each other.
Your spouse is not all things to you. OMG #marriagegoals #imarriedmybestfriend #bffs Gag! Your spouse cannot be all things to you. If you expect him to fill the roles of confidant, best friend, motivator, lover, intellectual stimulant, domestic partner and co-parent, somewhere along the way you will be disappointed. It is very healthy to have friends who you confide in, and go on outings with.
Have you or someone you know experienced loneliness in their marriage? If so, how have you handled it? Share this post for your friends who are lonely in their marriages.
Written By: Carla DuPont Huger
Follow Carla on Instagram: @WriteWithCarla