Considering it’s supposed to be the polite way to reject someone’s advances, an awful lot of confusion is created when people say, “Let’s be friends.” Although women use the line the most, it’s weird that they don’t know what it means to us men, why we have negative reactions toward it or how to react when it’s used toward them. Let me explain…
When men hear the phrase, “Let’s be friends,” he knows the best response is just to swallow his pride and say ok. He wants to call BS loud as heck, but that would be petty. Most times, when a woman says “Let’s just be friends,” what he hears is, “Let’s be acquaintances.” He knows she has no intentions of truly being his friend or getting to know him, and if she was a friend it’s about to get awkward. Time has taught men that what women are really saying is “Let’s be cordial in public and not mention this again.”
However, when men use the phrase, it means something different. When men say let’s be friends, he doesn’t want to date or commit to you, but any other form of relationship is not completely off the table. That can range from we can still hang to we can be friends with benefits, but no relationship or true friendship.
In both instances, “friends” is being used to soften the rejection. Often, neither party is truly interested in being friends. As adults, why are we lying to each other? If you’re not interested, why use the illusion of friends? After the phrase is spoken, there will be no getting to know each other, no secrets exchanged, no real conversation; nothing that a friendship entails.
“Let’s be friends” is usually BS sprinkled with game, and it’s one of the reasons men and women have awkward relationships of all kinds.
It’s one reason many people believe that men and women can’t be platonic friends. We live in a world where women are encouraged to lie, insult the intelligence of men, play games or try to embarrass men they don’t wish to accept advances from. That is exactly why we live in a world where men don’t know how to accept rejection; they simply don’t believe what you’re saying. A generation of bitter men is on the rise, and they’re throwing around let’s be friends as revenge.
Written By: Johnny Brownlee II
Follow Johnny on Instagram: @slin_k_polymath