Love is so fresh and feels so good in the beginning. As we get comfortable with our mates, we tend to let our guards down. Over time, a little going out here and catching up with an old friend there leads to insecurities.
Insecurities can easily add issues to any relationship. Accusations can range from reasonable to totally ridiculous. What makes insecurities so stressful is the constant bombarding of questions, accusations, along with snooping through phones, emails and social media accounts. Feeling like you are under a watchful eye is no way to live. Not to mention your boo’s insecure behavior is a major turnoff. Trust is absolutely one of the key factors in a relationship. Without it, many would say there is no reason to even be in a committed relationship. Here are five helpful tips for turning around his doubtful ways.
- Check your own behavior. What are you doing that could contribute to your boo’s insecurities. Are you a flirt? Do you ignore him? Have you recently changed your routine? Look at yourself, first, before placing all of the blame on him.
- Delicate reassurance. Your man wants to know that even after being in a relationship with him for a significant period of time, you are still attracted to him. Complimenting him on his new shirt, noticing his fresh shape-up, or buying a just because gift are a few subtle ways to demonstrate you’re still feeling him. Maintaining contact with him while you are out with the girls is another way to let Bae know he is on your mind.
- Take him with you. Ok, I heard the collective, “Ugh!” but if you are hanging out with people he doesn’t know, best believe he is going to think something is up. Invite him out for a girls’ night or to lunch. Watching you interact with your friends will show him what’s really up. Girls just wanna have fun!
- *clears throat* Attire, ladies. You can’t be bopping around in the streets looking like a thot and not expect him to suspect something. You can look fabulous without showing everything. If you are lucky enough to be off the market, look like you belong to somebody.
- Be a true friend. His insecurities may stem from a past relationship where he was cheated on, or it could be that he simply doesn’t want to lose you. More than likely, you are his best friend. Don’t take that for granted and don’t poke fun of his clinginess. He could be worried about losing you. Awww!
He needs to know that it’s pushing you away, but the first step to adjusting jealous behavior is knowing the motive behind it. Find out why he is insecure, then work to reassure him.
Written By: Carla DuPont Huger
Follow Carla on Instagram: @writewithcarla