This Valentine’s Day God is my partner. Of course God is not my man, and we are not in a relationship because that would be creepy. Nevertheless, he is my everything and his love, trust, and peace is what I desire in my life at this point more than even a relationship. A few months ago I decided I wanted to trust God in all areas of my life, including sex and became celibate. Its true celibacy means you’re not sexually active, but most importantly it is a time for you to find yourself and become whole. Although only 3% of Americans wait until marriage to have sex, celibacy is becoming the “NEW HOT THING”. For example, celebrity couple Meagan Good and her husband Devon Franklin have become living proof if you trust God, and wait until marriage to have sex you will surely reap what you sow.
Social media has redefined the way we hook-up and date. Intimacy is defined by the comments you post under a selfie, or what you post in a DM. Texting have become the new avenue of communication. We have dissociated ourselves from our emotions making it impossible to feel love or intimacy. This epidemic has made it possible for me to feel alone, even when I was in a relationship. I realized that I played a part in this epidemic, and my sex life and relationships were among the things that suffered the most. All of my relationships were the same. I gave, gave, and gave until I felt empty inside. After every sexually encounter I felt like I lost a piece of me and for what? A night of pleasure that left bruises on my heart? I decided that I needed a change and CELIBACY is my cure.
I am content in this season of my life because I know my future husband will be hand-picked by God. It is easy to fall apart when you put your trust in man. In the bible it says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding:” (Proverbs 3:5). I had to be honest with myself, and know that I am not ready to be in a relationship. I felt like I was constantly looking for my husband and it was overwhelming. I trust the process God is taking me through to fall in love with myself. In order for you to love someone else you have to fully love yourself. As I embark on this journey of celibacy I know that my life and body is a living sacrifice for the Lord. I know that God will reward me and I am looking forward to day that I meet my husband.
Celibacy isn’t for everyone but those who do commit to it, the reward is priceless.
Written by Shantae Kemp
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