In a perfect world, your family and friends are welcoming, warm and kind to your new found love. The reality is, we don’t live in a perfect world and everyone has an opinion. Of course you appreciate and value the opinion of others, especially those you love. But, exactly how much do you take into consideration and is it enough to make or break the relationship? Find out what these women had to say when faced with this dilemma.
“It didn’t matter what he did, what he said or how many times I tried to defend him; my sister just wasn’t feeling him. I was definitely faced with some very tough decisions to make. After my son was born things got worse! It came to the point where I had to choose and naturally I chose the father of my son.” said, Kaitleen M. 32, of Jackson, TN. “I don’t have any regrets and even though we aren’t together he is a great father. Who knows, if I would’ve listened to my sister, he may not have even been around to help me raise my son and that would be a terrible injustice to my son.”
“I don’t think it’s anyone’s business who you date. If you are grown and paying your own bills why does that matter? I think that at some point in time everyone has gone through something like this. At that moment you don’t think or even calculate your next move. I can speak for myself and I was just trying to get by day to day. My mindset and focus was on me. I didn’t care about what my family had to say. Eventually, they fell in line and realized that it was more important keeping me in their lives as opposed to sacrificing losing me over a man!” Gwinteena S. 33, of Washington, DC.
“If your family is telling you not to date someone then maybe you should take heed before overlooking what they are saying. If your mama is telling you to drop the dog, then more than likely it’s something she sees in that man and she knows he means you no good! Now that I am the proud mother of a 17 – year – old girl, I can agree 100% that there is a such thing called a mother’s intuition and baby it’s real. I used to ignore my mother all of the time when it came to my daughter’s father and low and behold he was a cheating S.O.B.! The only thing good that came out of the relationship was my daughter.” Patrice R. 38, of Grand Rapids, MI.
“I’m a gay 27 year – old male. So, I can’t say if my family is telling me not to date a man because of his gender or if they are telling me not to date him because of his character. I can’t say that everyone in my family is without a shadow of a doubt comfortable with me dating men, but what I can say is that I am sure that behind closed doors they have plenty to say about me and mine. As long as they respect me and who I choose to date that’s all that really matters. Because one thing I don’t tolerate is disrespect!” said De’ Ontavious 25, of Gainesville, MD.
While there isn’t a direct approach to how this situation should be handled, one thing is for sure, it should always be discussed with a mutual level of respect. Family values are the foundation to a good relationship. Listen with your heart, but take action with your mind.
Written By: Tahanee
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