[Couple Lying in Bed]. Retrieved May12, 2016. From https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/1b/18/2d/1b182d3a1981b27c5e4cb4a0f22a2110.jpg

Dating millennials are dealt a difficult hand when entering the dating world. While most women dream of being romanced and swept off their feet, our sex drives may delay that for a while. Having friends with benefits can be both a good and bad thing depending on what you’re looking for, so it’s best to know how to play the game.

[Couple Flirting] Retrieved May 12, 2016. From http://www.singleblackmale.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/flirting.jpg
[Couple Flirting] Retrieved May 12, 2016. From http://www.singleblackmale.org/wp-content/uploads/2013/06/flirting.jpg
Hookup culture leaves us with very few options and often leaves us feeling confused, empty and used. No one tells you of the reputation you acquire during your busy love life.  While some men can be forgiving and turn the other cheek about your sexual past, others will hold you to a certain standard when it’s time to make a commitment. Avoiding hookup culture may be inevitable to some, but they’re ways to get around being a statistic. Here are five tips to help you avoid hookup culture.

  1. Allow them to court you. A person will address you based on how you represent yourself. If you represent the best, they will treat you as such. Allow them to earn your friendship and respect.
  2. Don’t just text, talk on the phone. Many millennials don’t speak on the phone because they’re busy, but people make time for who they choose to. Talking on the phone allows you to hear your partner’s voice and get a feel for how they react to you. Texting can lead to a lot of confusion and misunderstandings.
  3. Go on dates often. Going on dates gives you more opportunities to get to know a person outside of the bedroom. While sex is fun, there are plenty of other things to do besides lay-up; consider movies, sightseeing, and travelling instead.
  4. Don’t try to fit in. In other words, if all he wants is sex, you don’t have to agree to be his sex toy. To the contrary, if you give in against your will, you won’t be able to convince him that you’re worth anything. Learn to walk away from a situation where someone wants more than you can offer.
  5. Double standards exist. What’s good for him may not be right for you. People judge you off of past experiences so make decisions for your future self.

When it’s all said and done, you have to set personal standards and stick with them. Just because you’re in the midst of the hookup culture, doesn’t mean you have to be of it. Here’s to finding someone worthy of your time and attention.

Written By: Tamara U. Butler


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