Rejection is a feeling that most people do not like to receive or inflict upon others, but over the years, with enhancements in technology and the ability to connect and communicate with so many people instantly, rejection seems to be encouraged. Social media sites have given people the ability to accept or ignore an invitation of “friendship” in less than two seconds with the simple click of a button. Gone are the days when you have to see or speak with someone in order to reject their platonic or romantic advances. The ease of rejection has numbed most to the actual process of expressing disinterest and giving an explanation for it.
“It’s me, not you” is a common phrase that is used to end relationships, with the assumption that it’ll take less of an emotional toll on the person. Unfortunately, saying that doesn’t necessarily always work! We all know that the true meaning of the phrase is … ‘I’m just not interested in a relationship with you.’ Rejection isn’t necessarily a bad thing (being rejected in certain cases can ultimately keep you in line for a better end result than you originally expected or hoped for). But as with many other circumstances, when feelings are involved, specifically in a relationship you hoped would progress successfully, rejection can get ugly and can lead to low self-esteem.
When rejected by a lover, many women are left to wonder what they could have done differently in the relationship, asking themselves things like: “Was it something I said?”; “Did I act like I wasn’t interested?”; “Does he not find me attractive?”. And the questions will only multiply, lessen your self-esteem, and cause you to become guarded … unless you are honest with yourself.
Sometimes things simply do not work out. You have the right to feel sad and disappointed. After all, you allowed someone into your life with the hope that it would be a lasting relationship, but doubting your every action will only lead to failure in the future. Instead of focusing on the negative, embrace the rejection as a gift and not a curse.
Although this may sound cliché, his loss is your gain. The worst thing you can do is lose confidence in your qualities and decisions. The time will come when someone wonderful accepts and loves the beautiful, intelligent, and committed woman that you are. In the meantime, do not allow rejection to stop you from loving and respecting yourself.
By LaRonda Hollis